My Twitter Follow-Back Policy

Most people are on Twitter either to learn or to promote, or both.

I follow everybody back on Twitter except for three kinds of folks.

1. People who aren’t people.
2. The people who tell me I can get 10,000 followers like they did and then you click through to their profile and you find that they have only 189 followers. Hmmm. How’s that working out for you?
3. Creeps. Obvious creeps. I’m a kid book writer. No creeps. I don’t follow creeps and I don’t want creeps following me. That’s creepy.

 Who to follow

As a writer of children’s books, I want to follow parents of my target market and I want them to follow me back so I can learn from them and promote my work (Foreshadowing here: I can’t promote to a nonfollower.) As a writer who is publishing and marketing his work, I want to follow teachers and librarians to learn what kids are reading and I want them to follow me back so I can promote my work (Sound familiar?)

 We all want more followers on Twitter

If you’ve gotten close to the 2000 following mark, you’ve no doubt hit the ratio wall.  For some reason, the Twitter gods decided that you could only follow 2000 people and then in order to advance, you have to maintain a super twecret ratio of followers to followings.  I think it’s like 20%. (Scratch that. Update: 20% didn't work. Try 10% ratio.)

Regardless, you have to unfollow people to move on.

Who to unfollow

If you can follow, then you can unfollow. Since you have to adhere to the mysterious x% follow ratio, you will eventually have to unfollow some folks. I’ve been using www.justunfollow.com and it’s pretty good.

I am also developing my own unfollow philosophy

I now unfollow most people who have a ridiculous ratio. The other way. By that, I mean people who have 15K followers, while they follow only 12 people. Really? Are you that great? Come on, man. We’re just people here.

I’m really not that great. Honest. I’ve written some really good action-adventure travel books for children. But I am certainly not so awesome that I just have people follow me without following back. Following back is common courtesy. And it’s Karma.

Ted Coine says it perfectly, “any time you don’t follow someone back, you’re limiting who else they can follow. That’s not nice. Be nice.”

There is really only one true way to get followers on Twitter

Good Content. Period. End of story. Post good stuff. People will follow. Help other people promote their stuff. They will follow. Twitter is not about getting more followers for the sake of getting followers; Twitter is about people helping other promote what’s important.

A funny thing happened on the way to 2000 followings

I noticed that many people I followed had enormous followings and they followed relatively few. Here's the rub. In order to surpass 2000 followings you might have to unfollow people who are not following you back. I have used justunfollow.com and I use manageflitter.com (nice guys from New Zealand). 

We all have a few exceptions

Okay, celebrities aren’t going to follow you back. Sorry. For me, my exceptions are Nathan Bransford @NathanBransford because of his literary sagacity. (vocab word!) He has no reason to follow me back. Tim Ferris @tferris is another one but, hello, the guy invented the 4-hour workweek. And, Chris Guillebeau @chrisguillebeau is not going to follow me back because he’s traveling to every country on the planet. Really. I also follow him because he’s got an awesome Cajun name (and he’s a non-conformist iconoclast.) Ted Coine should be an exception for me, too. But he follows back because he’s real.

Be real and follow people back. You might learn something, or promote something, or both.

1 Ted Coine inspired me to write this. Thanks Ted. Check him and his work out here. To find out more about me, please visit my new (as in WIP) site: CrimeTravelers. or here to the new book.

I had a classroom in Africa.

I have been a crazy busy teacher since January 1. Teaching is such a high. But I gotta have some more of it. So, this letter is more or less a cover letter for my teaching resume. Yes, this post is a blatant expression of self-promotion. (pic from my classroom in Africa)

Dear Head of School et al.

When a parent walks into a teacher’s classroom, anything can happen.
“Hi, I’m Pam,” she said. “Lauren’s mom.”
Was this a good thing?
The bangles clanged on her wrist as she extended her hand. “I’ve heard you’re the kids’ favorite substitute.”
Nice.
“I’m so happy to meet you,” she continued. “Lauren just loves writing, now.”
“That’s great,” I said. “She’s such a good kid… what do you expect.”
“No,” the mother said. “She loves writing because of what you said.”
“What I said?”
“You told her everybody could get on the internet, but only she had access to the stories in her head.”

Bullets and PowerPoints are not enough.
Without stories, we are lost.

In this highly distracted age, a teacher has to bring excitement to the classroom. After a writing sabbatical, I have returned to the classroom with a contagious passion for excellence in English, History, Geography, Modern Languages, and Writing. I would like to apply for any current or future open positions at the school that would best use my talents.

In West Africa as a Peace Corps volunteer teacher, I planned, developed, wrote, and taught all language materials for five classes. Stateside, I have taught History, Geography, and English in DC Public Schools. I have been the Business Manager of $2.5 M Independent School and have been Director of Development, Head of a Foreign Language Department, French Teacher, ESL teacher, and an English teacher.

About eight years ago, roughly September 12th (yes, that one), I left the everyday classroom in search of a world classroom. I started writing. I wrote stories, mostly for children, in hopes of inspiring travel and openness. Now my writing portfolio consists of a middle-grade series of five manuscripts, a middle-grade novel, two picture books, a chapter book, an edgy YA novel, a collection of short stories, micro-fiction, and even ad copy and a screenplay.

None has been published and not for lack of trying, but such is the world of New York publishing. I am currently a member of the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators. I attend the annual conferences and am plugged into anything and everything going on in contemporary children’s literature. For me, progressive education means I need to know what is being published for kids, not only today, but also tomorrow. I happen to know the Tenners, personally!

The research for my own stories took me (and my family of four) to France for a year and Spain for two years. If you ask the sixth graders at Graland Country Day School, they will tell you my stories are ready to publish. But, as I wait for the editors in New York to catch up to Graland’s children, I realize I am wasting my talent by not teaching every day.

I have a B.A. in English and American Literature from Millsaps College in Jackson, Mississippi, with a minor in French. I have an M.A. in Intercultural Management from the School for International Training in Brattleboro, Vermont.

I speak French at a U.S. Foreign Service Level of 4.0/5.0. Spanish at a 2.0 level. While in the Peace Corps, I tested in Hassanyian Arabic at 2.0 (it’s awful now). I am a dabbler. I know the greetings and other practical and fun stuff in Portuguese, Wolof, Soninke, German, and maybe a word or two in Mayan.

An English curriculum is my sweet spot, although with my background, I am prepared to jump into any of the liberal arts and/or administrative fields.

What would I do differently in an English classroom?

Writing is thinking.

I would have every child write every day. Every. Child. Every. Day. In addition to thinking and communicating, daily writing for the younger set is also a means of practicing penmanship. Writing every day in middle and upper school improves typing and computer skills. From the teacher’s perspective, writing, especially first thing in the morning, can be an insightful tool for assessing a child’s current emotional needs.

Necessary as it is, grammar can be boring. I would streamline grammar lessons and I would dramatize the teaching of vocabulary, where possible. Without drama, how else would you teach the word “anguish?” I would add more poetry to the curriculum as a means of teaching the true meaning of words, but we would have fun with the poems (and the poets, too!)

As a current parent, I offer a unique understanding of communication between home and school. As a teacher, I clearly convey what I expect from the students at the beginning—and the end—of the school year.

Recently, I gave a speech to the 700-plus student body about teaching in Africa. Every day, as the sun set over the Sahara, I knew it was my love for kids that kept me giving and giving even in the most difficult of Africa’s environments. I am always amazed at how deeply (and quickly) I care for each child, which was abundantly clear when I conducted the most recent fifth-grade parent conferences.

Anyone at Graland Country Day would give me a resounding recommendation, especially the kids. I believe in children and I think pedagogy should be child-centered.

The other day, standing outside the lockers in the hallway, McKenna Daily (fifth grader), summed it up for me.

“Mr. Aertker,” she told me, “when you’re in the class, I’m inspired.”

Sincerely,

Paul Aertker

Thanks for reading.

Boys Book Club

Some of the members of my newly-formed book club haven’t even read the beer yet.

Yes, we meet at bookhalls or German bookgartens. Ah, the smell of old books.

From floor to ceiling, nearly every point is crammed with literature. Stacked on the floor and scattered on tables and chairs, there are piles of hardbacks, paperbacks, and even unfinished manuscripts. Tomes of encyclopedias and neat mounds of art books next to messy heaps of fiction and nonfiction books. Series, magazines and newspapers novels, and novellas.

We like meeting at libraries because we think every book club should have some ice cold books to read.

Last week, the Cuervo ladies were giving out salt, lime wedges, and free short stories.

Now after several meetings, emails, fundraising parties, IPO’s, election of officers, and deals cut with our wives (all of whom have girls night out), we have an actual beer to read.

Seriously.

Meetings are the second Wednesday of the month. Call before you come; we meet at a different library watering hole each time.

Wait ‘til they see me blog about kid books

There was a lot of good floating around that conference. New friends, old friends, non-alcoholic beer (wink, wink), great agents and editors, all so approachable. Thank you.

I'm still hoarse from laughing.There was more than just the fun. There was real business going on.

I don't know if it was my energy or if I was "ready" or something, but the agents and editors at SCBWI LA GLAMFEST were different this time.

They were not only gracious and accessible this year, but a hint of something else flashed in their eyes. In everyone's eyes. Every single person at this conference on both sides of the desk seemed hungry.

Like we were going to take over the world with good kid books!

We're in the catbird seat here, people. Children's/YA market share is increasing and that's good. The quality of submissions (our competition) is getting better and better, which only makes for better books.

Write on.

Xenophobia

Fear of the Foreign.

I love summer because so many people travel and a few more bricks in the wall are taken down.

Every time I fly over the ocean, I try to pinpoint the exact spot over the Atlantic where I become a foreigner.

I've lived outside of my home culture to the point that the wall for me is rubble. That's a good thing. I am also a francophile. :~)

As far as writing for kids goes, I think they are starving for stories outside of their home cultures. My own stories are Jason Bourne for kids (boys, in particular). Fun. Fast. But quelque chose de different.

Mitali Perkins writes about this cultural divide. She inspired today's blog. You can check her out at http://www.mitaliblog.com/2009/07/ya-books-and-global-poverty.html

Fast Friends

I feel very rich in friends.

For me, we are always making new friends. Continually. I think it's the only way to feel rich is to be rich in friends.

When you meet someone new, you know pretty quickly. You know what I mean? You thin-slice.

I think I make friends pretty easily.

My newest bestest friend I've spent a total of maybe eight hours with him. Total face time, that is.

I met Sarah Frances' husband, John, the other day for the first time and he reminded me how easy it is to make friends with someone brand new to you.

Don't get me wrong here. This former mock-fugative is not without issue, either. John has faux-alQaida ties. He's known to chase bears with brooms. And he has trouble finding good fishing spots. But he has an open door and cold beer behind it.

That's my new criteria for friendship. Open door. Cold beer.

What's your criteria? Do you make friends quicker than others? And for the writery question of the day: Do boys make friends more easily (quicker and not necessarily deeper) than girls?

(photo credit: my oldest bestest friend)

Travel in France with kids

This post is for anyone traveling to France with kids.

There are four words you need, must have, when going to France.

1. Bonjour (hello/good day),
2. Au revoir (good-bye, literally: until the re-see)
3. Merci (thank you),
4. S’il vous plait (please, literally: if it is pleasing to you).

The most important is bonjour because it is the first impression word.

Contrary to popular belief, the French are very courteous.

To make the point, French youths (ratty looking boys with low hanging pants) commonly say “thank-you” to the city bus drivers when getting off the bus!

The main reason French think Americans are rude (and the reason they are rude to us) is that we do not say “Bonjour” when entering a store (shop, café).

French shopkeepers are like little Napoleons ruling over tiny dynasties!

The number one rule of all European cultures is to acknowledge the proprietor of a store, shop, or even the waiter in a cafe. (Even if it is a humble “hello” in English. But, in France, the “bonjour” is imperative.

Once you’ve said bonjour then you can use the “I don’t know another word” smile!!!
And they get it.

France is the most visited country in the world with more visitors than citizens.

What you’ve done by saying hello is say, “I am trying... meet me half way.”

S’il vous plait (See Voo Play) is very useful because it can introduce any need or want. When looking to buy something, typically you do not touch it first. If it is a self-service place, a sign will read, “Self-Service.”

French custom is many times very formal so they like to serve you. If you want something you might say, “S’il vous plait” and then say slowly in English what you want or point.

Au revoir (Oar ruh vwah), is important because it is last thing they hear from you and so leaves a good last impression.

Word four is Merci. (Mare see)
French are not lavish, like we are, with their thank you’s. Merci is used at the end, commonly when leaving with “Merci, au revoir.”

You don't need to say Maresee every time the waiter puts something on your table. It's his job.

KIDS IN FRANCE: Everyone loves it when parents ask their children to say, “Bonjour” and “Merci.” It is a big crowd pleaser!

Send a kid into the store with you and have the kid say Bonjour Madame. They will be buerre in your hands.

Here is my top five places to go with kids in Paris.

1. Tuileries Gardens. After your Louvre tour you’ll come out of the glass pyramid. The Tuileries Gardens are across the street and in the park you’ll find playgrounds, mule rides, and trampolines.

2. La Tour Eiffel (of course). See it at night at the top of the hour when the 10,000 strobe lights light it up.

3. Pompidou Center. Don’t even go in. Just watch the street performers in front of the museum. Sunday is best.

4. Picasso Museum in the Marais. A fun place to give kids a pad and pencil to copy Picasso’s work.

5. Ile de la cité and Notre Dame and Ile Saint Louis.

Eats.

At most cafés, brasseries, or even high-end restaurants you will find staek-haché et frites (hamburger and fries).

Pizza in France is very good.

Quick food places are the greek restaurants with the big spool of meat behind the counter. The Shawarma sandwiches are awesome.

Drinks in France are innumerable. For kids, they like Orangina and cassis and water. Or a Coke is "Cocah. See voo play."

For grownups on a hot day, a Monoco (a beer mixed with a little sprite) is great.

Au revoir.